Wednesday, September 1, 2010
CANCER SURVIVOR, JUDY ANN BEHUNIN...
SISTER SURVIVORS: "What were you diagnosed with, and what treatments did you have? Who were your doctors?"
JUDY: "I was diagnosed with Stage 3A, grade 3, Invasive Ductal Breast Cancer in the left breast. I was ER/PR positive, and Her-2/neu negative. I was treated with 8 rounds of chemotherapy, mastectomy, radiation, and reconstruction. Dr. Tittensor was my surgeon, and Dr. Bishop was my reconstruction surgeon. Dr Rich and Dr. Clark were my oncologists.
SISTER SURVIVORS: "How did your cancer diagnosis affect your family and friends?"
JUDY: "Initially, we were all terrified and thought it was a death sentence. My mother died just one month before my diagnosis and my family had just suffered through this. It was all too much for us. My amazing husband was a rock, and he gave me many priesthood blessings, and accompanied me to all my medical appointments. He was and is my hero. My younger 8-year-old became very insecure and clingy, and wouldn’t let me out of her sight. Our friends and distant family gave us so much support. In fact, when I was so sick with chemo, our neighborhood family totally organized, funded, and manned our son’s wedding. I felt and still feel so humbled at the generosity that so many people gave to me. My teenage son spent a lot of time in his room just trying to come to terms with my cancer. He became very emotional and moody. My children loved my bald head, and would massage my head."
SISTER SURVIVORS: "What was the hardest thing you had to go through during your cancer journey? What helped get you through it?"
JUDY: "When I was first diagnosed I was working a physically challenging job. I was so weak from the chemo that I passed out at work on a couple of occasions. It was very hard for me to get through that. I felt so embarrassed. Coupled with this was the fact that I was still mourning the death of my mother, and imagining all the terrible “what ifs” that could happen The chemo made me so sick that I couldn’t think, work, or function. I couldn’t even drive safely, so I started feeling depressed. I couldn’t eat very much at all. To combat this I listened to positive music, and kept a “gratitude journal”. I made my family take me for rides in the car. My friends organized visiting assignments for me. I read the scriptures and prayed. Gradually my usual cheery outlook emerged and I made it through."
SISTER SURVIVORS: "How did your cancer diagnosis change your life?"
JUDY: "I am much more health-conscious now. During chemo I lost 80 pounds, and I have been able to keep it off by changing my eating habits. Now my whole family eats healthier. I am more confident, outgoing, brave, and joyful now than before. I feel that I have a second chance at life, and I will no longer stand back and watch as life passes me by. I live for the moment and possibilities now and don’t worry so much about the “what ifs”. There is no better time than the present, so why put things off? For instance, our whole family is going on a cruise next month. I don’t think I would have planned a cruise before my diagnosis because I would have thought that we didn’t have enough money or time."
SISTER SURVIVORS: "What did you learn during your cancer journey?"
JUDY: "I have learned so many wonderful things. I guess one thing I have learned is that a “beautiful woman” is NOT a woman because of her body. The essence of womanhood comes from her soul and spirit, not her body. Secondly, I learned that we as human beings have an amazing ability to lift each other up. I like the quote “If the essence of my being has caused a smile to have appeared upon your face or a touch of joy within your heart, then in living I have made my mark”. By TL Odem, Jr. Thirdly, I learned that inside me there is a hero, and I can count on me, and so can others. "
SISTER SURVIVORS: "What have you changed as a result of your cancer diagnosis?"
JUDY: "I have learned to live for every moment and every relationship. Now I don’t “borrow” trouble by assuming the negative, or waste time by giving negative thoughts my attention."
SISTER SURVIVORS: "Do you have a favorite book or quote or song that became meaningful to you during your cancer journey?"
JUDY: "When I was having radiation, there was a verse taped on the wall of the dressing room. It was written by Eileen Lee, a breast cancer survivor. I copied that poem down one day, and hung it on my mirror. This verse has helped me to understand myself and find peace in each moment."
SISTER SURVIVORS: "What advice would you give to a woman who is newly diagnosed with breast cancer?"
JUDY: "I would just say, “Be patient with yourself. This too shall pass. Breast cancer is NOT usually a death sentence. Educate yourself to make informed decisions, and ASK for HELP.”
SISTER SURVIVORS: "What advice would you give to friends and family of a newly diagnosed breast cancer patient?"
JUDY: "The breast cancer patient sometimes needs to vent their feelings of anxiety, or frustration, or fear, or whatever. It is healthy for the patient to do so in a safe environment. Don’t be offended by their venting. Don’t think you can fix them or make them all better. Your role in their life is in supporting them as they work through this trial. Be positive with them and try to encourage them to live life as normally as possible and to talk about their feelings. Taking them places and doing things away from home can be very therapeutic."
SISTER SURVIVORS: "Finish this sentence… “I am a…”
JUDY: "I am a compassionate, cheerful friend, and a loving woman."
Thanks to Judy for a wonderful interview. If you'd like contact Judy, email us at sistersurvivors(at)gmail(dot)com, and we'll be happy to send the message on.
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Judy Behunin
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Kara,
ReplyDeleteJudy's words are wise and compassionate. She is the very essence of a survivor: Someone who's walked through the valley of the shadow of death and emerged on the other side, stronger than ever. I'm happy for her that she's adopted a healthier lifestyle and an attitude of gratitude. It's funny how something so life threatening has a way of changing our outlook on life, for the better, as well as the outlook of those around us. Bravo, sister! Continue to embrace your strength.
XOXOXO,
Brenda Coffee